Reject Guilt And Shame. Normalize Life.
2019, Celebration, Career, Communication, Courage, Discrimination, Fear, Identity, Life, Race, Relationships
2018, Career, Children, Emotional Health, Family, Friendship, Identity, Life, Love, Mental Health, Parenting, Relationships, Self-Care
I have worked in corporate America. I have worked in inner city classrooms of Chicago. Being a SAHM is still without question the hardest work I have ever done. This is in part because being a parent is more difficult than anyone lets on. My understanding of parenthood was incomplete… at times I think it still is. Being a stay at home mom is a 24/7 endeavor. From the time I wake up until I close my eyes, I am meeting the needs of someone who is not me.
Please don’t consider this a declaration of my unhappiness or complaint. On the contrary, being a stay at home mom is a gift. But it requires compartmentalization and understanding. There have been many days in this social political climate that I was grateful I didn’t have to go to work. Hell, sometimes I don’t even go to the grocery store because I don’t want to see the world. So, I know I would dread going to the office.
This isn’t complaining. This is me, sharing pertinent information. Also… listen carefully, I am not ignoring or minimizing the plight of working mothers. Most of them do what I do while working outside the home full time. For me, what I noticed and miss most was the drive to and from work. You know? Those small periods of time when I was alone to make uninterrupted phone calls or listen to music that is inappropriate for children who can talk. #JudgeYourOwnSelf
2018, Career, Fear, Identity, Life, Love, Mental Health, Parenting, Relationships, Self-Care, Self-Help
I’ve said it many times and I’ll say it again today. You are your only competition. The moment you start competing with other people; you've already lost. The only person I want to be better than is the woman I was yesterday. And listen, I think the woman I was yesterday is pretty dope, but I know on this journey there’s always room for growth. I cannot compare the today me against the today you because it is impossible to do and it just doesn’t make sense.
In scientific terms, when doing an experiment, to see the similarities and differences in something you would have to watch those things exclusively from start to finish; recording everything. You would need to know all variables or things effecting the subjects of the experiment. And therein lies the problem with social media. You can not see all the variables in the life of someone else.
2018, Career, Communication, Friendship, Identity, Life, Love, Relationships, Self-Care, Self-worth, Television
Isn’t this what often happens between women? Particularly in the workplace. Men pulling strings that shouldn’t exist. As we often say…. It is what it is. I guess I can get with Angela deciding, initially not to work with Nuri. *slight eye roll. The truth is— Angela hit her #ChooseYou dougie on Nuri and I didn’t like it. Her behavior indicated that she was the most beautiful, powerful, worthy person she knows. We MUST fight the urge to begrudge women this right because it does not fall in line with what we believe we deserve. There is enough of everything we desire for all of us. You might just have to wait your turn.
2018, Communication, Courage, Identity, Life, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Relationships, Self-worth, Career
This translates in adulthood to women who are environmental chameleons. Code switching as a dating mechanism. Ugh. A woman who transforms into who she thinks the man would find most agreeable. This is really so so tragic. It is a prison of your own design. This is why I cringe every single time I see a video of a man telling a woman how to find a man. It would be far more advantageous if she knew how to find herself. Maybe that’s not what the men in these videos really want… A woman who values her own identity more than she values attaching herself to a man to gain it. Yeah… That part.
2018, Abuse, Career Goals, Children, Communication, Courage, Disease, Fear, Friendship, Grief, Identity, Life, Love, Marriage, Mental Health, Parenting, Relationships, Self-Care, Career