#NotAFeminist

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I believe women are strong, intelligent, resilient, creative beings.  I know this because, well; I am one and I am all of these things.  So are the women who I have the pleasure of doing life with.  Also, women were chosen as the bearers of children. So, there’s that.  Women are totally badass.

I want us to pursue extraordinary endeavors and achieve unparalleled levels of success. I want that success to be consistent, anticipated and celebrated because we’re dope; not because we’re so marginalized that we deserve extra points just for making it through the shit. Imagine a female president or vice-president—Not just on television, but in real life.  I mean, I love the idea of women knocking over walls and breaking glass ceilings.  I just don’t want it at the expense of someone standing on my head.  That’s what feminism is to me. 

Feminism is someone standing on my head.

I am not a feminist. I gather you already figured that out though. I am a Black woman. More than that, I am Black—even before I am a woman. My sex was determined at about six weeks gestation.  My race was determined when my parents decided to be my parents.  This social construct we call race is a real complicated SOB.  And because I’m a truth teller— If not for being a Black woman I would totally be a feminist.  Instead, I see feminism as yet another caste system which places me, a Black woman, at the bottom.  Feminism wants my body, but refuses to defend the rights of it.  Ironic, right? 

I know many exceptional Black women who share my sentiment.  We are happy to share in the struggle.  Black women were right there helping to secure the right of women to vote. But it was the beloved Susan B. Anthony who famously spat, “I will cut off this right arm of mine before I will ask for the ballot for the Negro and not for the woman,” Remember that thing I told you earlier about me being Black first and a woman second? Yep, White supremacy sees it the same way.  Anthony might have been able to stomach White men alone having the right to vote, but she could not handle that the ratification of the 15th amendments’ inclusion of ALL men also included Black men.

It is the reason White women make up about a third of the national population, but receive more than half the coverage of missing women.  These cases of White women are disproportionately highlighted in mainstream media.  This distortion in reporting both implicitly and explicitly suggests that White women matter more.  When countless Black, Latino and Native American women go missing each year; where is feminism?  Especially when Laci Peterson, JonBenét Ramsey and Natalee Holloway are household names. And listen, I’m not blaming White women for this.  I’m just sayin.  White women must step to the plate.  I am lucky to have meaningful relationships with White women who understand this.  They want to do the work that they’ve come to realize can only be done by them.

*cue intersectionality*

Bigotry, in general, is intersectional. They hate you if you’re Latina . They hate you if you’re lesbian.  They hate you if you’re Asian.  They hate you if you're Muslim. They hate you.  They hate you.  They hate you. They literally hate you for everything that makes you you.  Intersectionality is necessary if the feminist movement is to sustain itself. Feminism needs to boldly proclaim its’ support and subsequently fight for the rights of all women.  Be clear. Intersectionalism cannot be reduced to a trend. My mom always says, “Your actions speak so loud I can’t hear what you say.”  Feminism needs this.  You’re White?  We stand with you.  You’re lesbian?  We stand with you.  You’re Black? We stand with you.  You’re 65 years old? We stand with you. We stand with you. You only need be a woman. We got the rest. Yeah. That’s what I want from feminism.  Until then— I’ll continue to be a Black woman who loves women... #NotAFeminist